An Excess of Exams
by Eilisan
Summary: “Everything is relative. You see, in comparison to your lovely frazzled self, I have all the time in the world.” Dedicated to all those who are currently suffering through exams. May this story give you hope that we aren’t the only ones suffering. A cute


**An Excess of Exams**

_Disclaimer: These characters that you see_

_Were not created by little me_

_This my great Disclaimer be_

_Please do not sue, let me be_ _free_

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The birds were singing joyfully, bedecked in their finest colors as they shed off the winters chill. Grass blades began to poke their tender heads through the ground, and reached forth towards the sun's golden rays. Grasshoppers chirped, Fang barked ecstatically; it seemed as if all of nature was rejoicing at its freedom from winter.

"It's that time of the year again!"

A quick knock on the door was her only warning before a flurry of robes burst through her doorway, the figure closing the door noisily behind him as he moved. One look at the graying beard and sparkling eyes was all she needed to identify the intruder.

"What's that Albus?" Minerva asked tiredly, turning her attention back to the paper she was currently grading.

"Oh yes!" Albus said cheerily, blissfully ignoring her lack of enthusiasm. "That wonderful time of the year when fanciful thoughts of spring turn to…thoughts of _exams_! Ah yes! The wonderful, joyous exam period…how I do love thee,"

Minerva tried her best not to sigh. It seemed as though this conversation had become a sort of annual tradition between the two of them. "Is that so Albus? Was it love at first sight?"

"The student's mental breakdowns, screams of pain caused by the endless review problems,"

"Albus…" Minerva muttered warningly, hoping beyond hopes that he wasn't going to talk about…

"And don't forget the paperwork!"

_No such luck_, Minerva thought, _better luck for avoiding the topic next year_.

"Albus…" she said exasperatedly,

"…the endless questions," he continued on, "The endless questions, one after the other that theirpoor, _poor_ teachers must endure as the children madly try to learn in the space of a few weeks what the teachers have tried to drill into their heads the entire year."

"Albus…"

"Ah yes," Albus continued on blithely, "Let's not forget the distraction during the classes! The mis-brewed potions! Transfigurations turned deadly because of exam nerves! Each and every dutifully memorized spell remembered completely wrong!" He sighed theatrically, eyes twinkling as they glanced over at Minerva, who currently held her hands over her ears in an attempt to shut out his blather. But he would not be discouraged – this was his time of the year to shine. "It's enough to destroy the sanity of any teacher. Yes, I pity those people who must _teach_ during this time of the year"

Minerva decided it was best not to dignify his words with a reply, and settled for angrily scratching over the paper with her quill, trying to imagine the words on the paper were in fact Albus's face.

Still, he continued: "Ah yes, it's one of the times that I truly appreciate my _desk job_. Oh yes, the days of teaching are…"

"Albus! Really now!" She looked up at that final comment, reaching over the table to pick up her glasses so that she would be able to glare at him properly. One could only stand such ramblings for a limited amount of time. "Just last week you were complaining about the bureaucracy present at the Ministry, the plans that have to be created in order to re-structure the east tower, the never-ending search to find another DADA teacher, and _now_ you have the _indecency_ to gloat as pain and suffering is thrown upon your loyal co-workers and…"

"Ah yes, my dear." He exclaimed happily "The tables are indeed turned."

Minerva sighed once again, eyes following his movements as he went over to her bay window to gaze out onto the sunlit lawn.

He leant against the window frame, studying the scene in front of him for a while, before casually remarking: "Yes, I do believe that, with all the extra time on my hands…"

"What extra time?" came the caustic reply.

He turned back to face her, a huge smile gracing his features at her indignation. "Everything is relative. In comparison to your lovely frazzled self, I have all the time in the world. Now, as I was saying, with all the extra time of my hands I do believe that I'll go out and take a nice stroll around the grounds. The flowers are in bloom and…"

He was half way out of the door before Minerva offhandedly remarked behind him: "Do be careful of the pollen."

"I beg your pardon?"

"The pollen, be careful." He stopped, signaling that he wished for her to elaborate on her statement by the inquisitive raising of his left eyebrow.

"Well, you see, part of the new curriculum for sixth years is the transfiguration of very small objects. It's exam time Albus, the children are studying. Why, you yourself have alerted me to how easily transfigurations by the stressed can lead to…"

She let her voice trail off, smile full of almost malicious glee at the look of utter dismay which crossed his face. _Oh how the tables are turned indeed._

"Oh." was the only response he could manage in reply.

Minerva continued on brightly, "The hallways are full of the stressed hormones of students; wrongly created spells are flying everywhere." She paused, as if in thought, for a moment. "Oh, do watch out for the oaken door on the fifth floor as you _stroll _along. Mr. Longbottom was testing out a potion which restores old wood to its natural glory, and I've heard that it's quite a forest in there."

Albus marched back into the room, crankily closing the door behind him before pulling up a chair in front of the window (which he first checked to ensure was locked tightly against wayward pollen). Moodily opening a book, he shot a disgruntled glare at Minerva.

Try as she might, she could not stop herself from throwing the final jibe at his expense: "Oh, how I do love the exam period…"

They say you could have heard his groan halfway across the campus.

A/N Luck with those exams everyone! Hang in there! Hope this made your stressed day a little lighter. Reviews are always appreciated!

Eilisan


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